Three's Always a Crowd
by VictorianChik
Summary: Summary: SPOILERS FOR CAPTAIN AMERICA : THE WINTER SOLDIER. On a date with Kate, Steve struggles with two incidents: his attraction for the pretty agent neighbor next door and Bucky crashing their tryst. Warning(s): Spanking; spoilers for the above-mentioned films; some implied swearing, but pretty much PG-13.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything from the films Captain America: The First Avenger, Avengers Assembled, or Captain America : The Winter Soldier and I'm not making any money from this fic.

**Author's Note:** I loved this movie and wanted to give you guys a one-shot. I meant it to be short and sweet, but I can't write anything brief apparently. But even at 3800 words, it's still a complete story.

The teakettle whistled loudly, and Steve grabbed it off the stove. The spout rattled against the mugs as he poured the hot water in over the teabags. Specks of burning water fell on his hand, but he barely felt them. He put the kettle down and tried to wipe his sweaty palms on his dark pants.

"Can I play some music?"

Steve nearly tripped into the counter.

"Yeah, yeah," he said, wishing he sounded a bit more casual. "Play any record you like."

"Oh, I don't want to scratch them. I'll play something on my phone through the laptop."

Steve didn't even bother asking what that meant. The fact that he was on a date, in his apartment, with a girl was enough to override any sense of modern competence he had obtained. And not just any girl, Agent Thirteen or Kate as she was going by.

Some kind of soft rock came from the living room, the type that Steve heard in stores with obnoxiously-colored clothes. He wasn't a sophisticated enough listener to figure out which era the music came from.

He picked up the tray and carried it into the living room, his hands quivering the slightest bit and causing the cups to clink.

Kate was on the sofa, playing with the laptop but she smiled as he came in. "Tea? Oh, that's nice."

Steve set it on the table and then stood there, wondering what in the world to do with his arms. What had he done with his arms before? Maybe he should hold something. Where was his shield? He could hold his shield.

No, that was stupid! Why would he hold his shield in the living room on a date?

Kate reached for a cup, but when he didn't move, she stood up. "Do you want to dance?"

"What? Oh, no. I don't –"

But she had already stepped close to him, so close he could see the dark pupils of her eyes. She put her hand on his arm and then laughed.

"Oh, you're sweating. And you're shaking. Am I that bad a date?"

He shook his head, not trusting himself to answer.

"Com'ere," she pulled him to the sofa and sat down beside him.

Steve gripped his knees, taking shallow breaths. He could smell her light perfume and the shampoo of her hair.

"Hey, hey," she put a hand on his arm. "Captain - Steve, calm down. Jeez, you make me feel like I'm about to rape you."

He flinched, and she put her hand on his chest while the other hand pulled the cord to her phone free from the laptop. The room went quiet, save for Steve's harsh breathing.

"Your heartbeat is really fast. Are you okay? Do I need to report you to medical?"

He flashed her a quick look. "Is that in your job description?"

She smiled, showing him pretty white teeth. "You see my purse over there? It's not for makeup. I have enough stuff in there to overpower you and get you to the lab if I have to."

He smirked a little. "A dozen agents couldn't subdue me. But you can?"

"Oh, Steve," she traced his collar as she moved closer, "I'm not talking about Shield or the CIA. I have a side deal with Dr. Banner and Mr. Stark to make sure you're okay."

"What?!"

"The moment I got assigned to you, they contacted me. Think of it as subcontracting."

"Did Natasha know?"

"She was the one who convinced me to take the deal but ask for more perks," Kate grinned at him. "How else do you think I got such a nice car?"

"Traitor," Steve laughed.

"Me?" her eyes were wide with mock innocence.

"No, the rest of the team. You tell them I'm not getting anywhere near a lab run by Tony or Bruce."

He expected a witty retort, but she shocked him by kissing him.

Steve went rigid, but Kate whispered in his ear, her breath tickling, "It's okay. We're just kissing. It doesn't have to go any further than this."

"I know," Steve nodded.

"This is just to help you relax," she went on, pausing to kiss his temple. "You saved the country, again. You're a hero, the brave soldier you've always wanted to be."

He turned and kissed her hard back.

Fifteen seconds later she had straddled him and their hands were all over each other.

Steve felt himself burn with want. He had never kissed a woman like this, and the way she grinded against him, moaning and sighing – it was enough to make him faint and he hadn't fainted since he had been injected with the super serum. When did women learn such things? And she looked like such a nice, polite girl.

Steve would have picked her up and insisted that they both behave, but she felt so good on top of him and he couldn't stop kissing her and making noises of delight himself.

With delicate precision, she was making small bites on his right ear while he groaned with pleasure when suddenly she jerked up.

"Someone's here," she rolled off him and lunged for her purse. When she straightened, the gun was in her hands, aimed towards his bedroom door.

Steve stared, stunned for a second. "What?"

"I have a security system around this apartment that buzzes when someone enters through the windows," she whispered, nodded towards the small bulge in her jeans' right pocket. "I installed it last week."

Steve stood, wishing he could hide the bulge in his own pants. But he grabbed his shield.

When he turned around, Bucky was standing in the doorway of the bedroom.

"Bucky?" Steve blinked, hoping he was not hallucinating due to overstimulation.

"Captain, stand back," Kate commanded in her best Agent Thirteen voice. "I'm contacting headquarters. The CIA will-"

"Hold on, hold on," Steve raised a hand.

It was Bucky, but a Bucky looking slightly awful. He was in ordinary clothes that were dirty, his long hair hung around his face in drab locks, and he was clutching a bottle of vodka as he glared sullenly at Steve through sunken, bloodshot eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Steve set the shield down.

"Better keep that up," Bucky sneered. "I might try to kill you and your call girl."

"She's an agent and you're not going to kill me, not after you pulled me out of the river. Where have you been? What's going on?"

Kate hadn't moved, the gun trained on Bucky's head.

Bucky took a gulp out of the bottle which only held a few inches of the clear liquid.

"You can't get drunk, not with the stuff they pumped you full of. Give me the bottle." Steve held out his hand.

Bucky looked murderous for a second, his metal arm tightening into a fist. But instead of spinning into violence, he took another gulp.

"I said, give it here," Steve flung his shield, swiping the bottle out of Bucky's hand and catching it before it could spill on the carpet.

"Bugger you, Rogers," Bucky shouted. "I'm going to rip you to pieces."

"Kate, why don't you –" Steve glanced at her, but she was gone.

He saw her at her purse, touching her right ear. "Steve, cover your ears."

"Huh?"

"As for you, Winter Soldier," Kate stalked up to Bucky, "it looks like springtime has come to America and you've melted."

"Get out of my way, you stupid cow," Bucky reached toward her with his metal arm.

Kate lifted her arm and clicked something.

Bucky froze in mid-step, his eyes wide. He wavered and then fell backwards, his body rigid.

Steve hadn't heard anything, but his balance went and he fell roughly to his hands and knees.

"That's right," Kate took an ear plug out of her right ear and then her left. "Courtesy of one Tony Stark. He gave me this little gadget that causes temporary paralysis. Apparently he was defeated once by someone using this, but he said there was no reason why I couldn't use it to subdue Captain America in case he became, and I quote, 'A giant flag-covered pain in the ass'. Poetic."

Steve made a gargling sound, but Bucky lay on his back, eyes still glaring.

"I told you to cover your ears," Kate stepped past him and pulled a pair of handcuffs out her purse. "And these are made with the strongest metal short of adamantium that Banner could find. "That's right boys," she rolled Bucky over onto his front, "Agent Thirteen is ready to play ball."

"Blaw?" Steve gargled. "Wha blaw? Ahm Taptin – uh, Captain –"

"We all know you're Captain America," she locked Bucky's good arm and metal arm behind his back. "And it will wear off you two soon because you're both super-soldiers, and I was closer to him than you so you should recover in a few seconds."

Steve tried to move, but his limbs were numb and prickly like they had fallen asleep.

Kate came back with a pair of ankle shackles, and she locked Bucky up snugly.

Kate picked up her gun again, aiming at Bucky who was starting to make weak groans of protest.

With heroic effort, Steve rolled to his side and sat up, watching the room tilt.

"If I were a woman who made frequent puns," Kate took a cup of tea and added two sugar cubes and stirred it, "I would say something about freezing the Winter Solider or liking my Russian assassins cold and shaken, not stirred. I don't know – I think the springtime pun was one enough. Steve? You ready to stand?"

"Yeah," Steve said and stood dizzily. "I can't believe you used that on us. And I wasn't even that close. Bucky, are you okay?"

Bucky made a sound dangerously close to swearing.

"Your call now," Kate took a sip of tea. "Mmm, Earl Grey. Nice, though I'm more a coffee girl."

"I would take him to Shield but that's no longer operating," Steve scrubbed his hand over his face that was still tingly. "I don't know enough about the CIA to know what would happen to him . . ." he glanced at her.

Kate set the cup down. "Guantanamo Bay."

"But –"

"He's a terrorist."

"He's been brainwashed."

"As are most terrorists."

Her calm face unnerved him, but he recognized the demeanor of a soldier – decisive, unemotional, and determined. He thought he might be in love. She was so much like Peggy . . .

"Ow, Bucky garbled. "Uh, you tupid uckin' bish."

"Hey!" Steve gave Bucky's side a light kick. "Don't call her names. Even if you take all the spy/assassin stuff out, she still had the right to overpower you. Women have the right to defend themselves against drunks who break into their boyfriend's apartments."

"Slow down, Rogers. This is just our first date."

Heat bloomed across Steve's face and he stammered for clarification, "I – I just meant, the context here – it's not really –"

"You're cute," she smirked. "Were all men as cute as you in the 40's?"

Steve found himself grinning like an idiot, but he hoisted Bucky to his feet, careful to keep the handcuffs from wrenching his arms too hard. He was about to put Bucky over his shoulder and take him . . . somewhere. Probably to Nick Fury. Or maybe to Natasha.

Bucky stiffened and he spat at Kate. She moved back in time, but he snarled as he writhed against the cuffs and the shackles.

"Guess you're not as strong as our guys' metals," Kate noted.

Bucky bared his teeth. And then he called her the C word.

The harsh, four-letter cut through the apartment like a slap. Kate blinked, her mouth quirking into an ironic smile. Obviously, it wasn't the first time she had been called obscene names.

But Steve went livid. He had heard it used a few times in the army, but never, ever in his platoon. Who could have imagined that calm, sweet Bucky would ever use such a term against the pretty blonde girl standing only a few feet away from him?

"James Buchannan!" Steve barked out, using Bucky's first and middle name like their parents had used eighty years ago as reprimands.

A shadow of guilt flashed over Bucky's face, but it turned to alarm as Steve yanked him towards the sofa. Pausing to nudge the coffee table away from his leg, Steve sat on the sofa and pulled Bucky over his lap.

"No, no, Steve," Bucky was thrashing against the cuffs, his shacked legs kicking up. "Don't you dare!"

Kate cocked her head to the side. "What are you going –"

Steve brought his hand down hard on Bucky's rear-end. The sound shot through the room just as harshly as the swear word had earlier.

"Oh, okay," Kate blanched. "Is this army protocol from –"

SWAT! SWAT! SWAT!

Kate stood dumbfounded as she watched her date and the man cheered as America's hero spank the man known as the Winter Soldier. She wasn't sure if she should leave or sit down and drink more tea. Maybe take pictures to later blackmail Hydra?

"Stop it, stop it!" Bucky struggled. "Steve, no, not in front of her. Steve, Steve!"

"I can't believe you used that word," Steve spanked him again and again with his right hand, squeezing Bucky tight against his stomach with his left hand. "You know better than that, and I'm not standing for that from you, James Buchannan. Not today, not ever. I wouldn't kill you on the plane, but you better believe I don't have a problem with punishing you for this."

"Ah!" Bucky kicked, the shackles clanging loudly. "I'm going to tear you to pieces. I should have never pulled you out of that lake."

"That was you?" Kate asked. "I guess that begins to make up for the lives you took and damage you made."

"Hydra!" Bucky yelped between swats.

"Hydra nothing!" Steve moved his swats down to the back of Bucky's thighs. "Hydra didn't teach you to use language like that or break into people's apartments while drinking. The army didn't teach you that either, and had you acted like that under my command, I would be doing exactly this. Am I getting through to you?"

Bucky lowered his head for a second, but then he shot it up in defiance and let loose with a round of bitter swearing.

Kate looked like she was trying not to laugh, but Steve set his teeth in his best Captain America grimace. "Agent Thirteen, please go into my bathroom. There is a new bar of soap under the sink. Bring it to me please."

As she left, Bucky protested, "No, Steve. You can't. I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

A memory flashed across Steve's mind. The two of them at age ten, summer heat on a Saturday afternoon, coming back to Bucky's home. Mrs. Barnes had scolded him for coming late to dinner, and Bucky, tired and hungry, had snapped at her. Two seconds later, Bucky had been across his mother's lap, getting smacked with her wooden spoon. Steve had fled to his own home, but as he dashed down the stairs, he had heard Bucky's plaintive pleas, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Mama!"

Most children had been spanked back then, even Steve himself, whose stubbornness had gotten him into trouble a few times though his parents had rarely done more than smacked him a couple times before he burst into tears.

Kate's return broke through Steve's thoughts. She had the soap and without being asked, she grabbed Bucky's jaw and held the soap at his lips.

Bucky pressed his lips together and slightly shook his head.

"Bucky," Steve landed a terrific wallop that rocked Bucky's whole body. "Take it in or I'll spank you until you do and then keep going. You know you deserve this. You know I'm right."

Bucky whined, but he opened his mouth an inch and Kate slipped it in.

"Make sure he doesn't spit it out," Steve readjusted his grip on his best friend and started spanking again. He kept a steady pace and he made sure to cup his hands so the sound was louder than it should have been. It was purely psychological to shake up Bucky without having to hit him too hard. Steve remembered some of the public punishments from the army; having to do push-ups in the rain was a hundred times worse with fellow soldiers standing at attention to watch the humiliation than punishments carried out in private. That's why Kate was still there, and that's why Steve kept scolding in his captain voice that brooked no nonsense.

"You weren't raised that way, and I refuse to believe that all the brainwashing in the world could erase basic manners that were installed into both of us. We treat women with respect, and we do not use foul language to hurt people's feelings."

Bucky sputtered around the soap and kicked his legs up frantically. Kate left his head and moved to Steve's other side to grab the chain linking Bucky's feet, holding them down so he couldn't kick Steve.

"You kick Kate and you'll be bare for the rest of this _and_ feel my belt," Steve warned. "So you lie there and take this and I won't turn you over to the CIA."

The rest of the spanking was sharp and quick. Steve had Bucky squirming (but not kicking) and yelping, but it wasn't until he heard Bucky choke on a sob that Steve stopped.

He put his hand on Bucky's rear and could feel the heat radiating through. "Is this enough or do you need another round?"

Bucky quickly shook his head, sniffing hard.

Steve reached and took the soap out of Bucky's mouth. There were deep teeth grooves on both sides.

"Are you ready to apologize?"

Bucky made a face. "Sorry," he muttered.

"Try again."

"I'm sorry."

"'I'm sorry, Kate, for using that word'?"

Bucky wiggled back and forth, but Steve held him, silent and stern.

"I'm sorry, Kate, for using that word," Bucky finally admitted.

"What about your bad attitude?" Steve went on. "Are you sorry for that?"

"Steeeeve!"

"Well?"

"We're adults," Bucky pouted. "I can have a bad attitude if I want to."

"Not in my house."

"It's an apartment!"

"Bucky."

"I'm sorry for my attitude. Now let me up."

Steve hid his smile as he pulled Bucky up to stand. The shorter man swayed back and forth as if to alleviate the sting his bound hands couldn't reach.

"Do you have a key to the cuffs?" Steve asked.

Kate hesitated as if to object but she took a small key card out of her purse (which now Steve would think of as the Purse full of Advanced Weaponry). "Push the green button to release the cuffs, the blue for the shackles."

Steve pushed the green button, and Bucky let out a sigh of relief as his good arm and metal arm swung free. He pulled them forward to stretch them, waiting for Steve to unlock his ankles.

But instead Steve locked the cuffs back on him, securing his arms in the front.

Bucky looked up with dismay and protest. "But I thought –"

"You are going to lie down on this sofa and sleep for tonight, and I'm not having you run off and I have to chase you all over New York. It's dangerous out there, especially for a wanted fugitive." Steve pushed Bucky down on the sofa, ignoring his groan of pain, and made him lie on his right side so the metal wouldn't dig into his side. "Kate, do you mind getting a blanket from the bedroom?"

"I'm not a child, Rogers!" Bucky gave a half-hearted kick, but Steve ignored it as he got a pillow under his head. "I'm not going to sleep here all chained up either. You're going to regret this."

When Steve didn't reply, Bucky asked quietly, "Can't you let me rub for a few minutes?"

"The soreness is a good reminder to behave," Steve reached for his gym bag and took out an unopened bottle of water. "Drink some of this so you won't be dehydrated in the morning."

Bucky's eyes were sullen and accusing as he gulped down the water, looking like he would rather not have Steve's hand on the back of his head holding him still. By the time the bottle was empty, Kate had a cotton blanket unfolded, and Steve spread it over Bucky who grimaced.

"I don't need a blanket. They used to make me sleep outside in the snow."

"This is America," Steve turned off all the lights expect for a corner lamp. "You get a sofa and blanket here."

"Be a good boy," Kate smiled as she shouldered her purse. "Tomorrow, we're getting you showered, shaved, and a haircut."

Bucky muttered something mean under his voice, but Steve ignored him again as he turned to Kate. "Sorry to cut our night short –"

"Oh, it's not over, not yet," she tossed back her blond wavy hair. "Let's go into your bedroom for a while."

Steve froze, his face heating up.

"Not for sex," she put a hand on his shoulder, "Just to cuddle for a while. We can kiss a little more if you like, but nothing more."

Steve nodded hesitantly. He let her take his hand and lead him towards his bedroom.

"Scaredy-cat," Bucky said as they passed.

Steve didn't reply. He guessed that was one name that was appropriate. Besides, he had left the lamp on because he remembered how Bucky as a child had been afraid of the dark.

An hour later, flush with kisses and squeezes, Steve saw Kate to the door. When he went back into the living room, he saw Bucky asleep on the sofa, and Steve stood over him for a second, quiet and sober just like he had all those nights long ago in the army. Then he went into his own room, careful to keep the door ajar to hear any noises during the night.


End file.
